Question #8 for Struggling Senior

Struggling Senior emails me:

Dear Kyle,
I ran across your blog the other day and Im in desperate need of advice.It’s my last year in high school and I want to make it the best. Party all year, meet a lot of new people and just have the time of my life. But here is the problem I feel so lonley like I dont have any “real” friends. Just every one is fake, I mean yeah I know its highschool 99.99% percent of teen girls are fake. But I can honestly say Ive always been real and down to earth and nice but for some reason im struggling. I see girls always with their little crew or like a best friend and I just dont have that. Id do anything for the best friend I can tell anything too. I mean I have a group of people I hang out with at school but out of school I almost never hang out with them and I always tell them to hit me up and they never do. I just feel so lonley. I could be going out like every day through the whole night but I just dont have the friends to. I really want a lot of friends but for some reason I dont. I dont know what it is because Ive always been told that Im hella funny and down to earth and just hella chill. Yet I dont have many people to hang out with and I always have to hit people up. Also for some reason I feel a lot more comfortable around guys and I just love to hang out with guys. When Im not a tomboy or anything, I just feel more comforatble and get a long with them better. My mom says its because all my cousins my age are guys. But I really dont think this has to do with anything. Anyways,  how could I get people to want to hang out with me, how can I make this the best year of my highschool years? By the way I want to send this message Janna too , so I can get a guy’s and girl’s point of view.
—-
Dear Struggling Senior,
I know what you feel about being lonely during high school. I did not have many friends but I did have a few great/best friends to help me enjoy my time at school. If you really want to make some good friends I highly recommend doing sports or joining clubs if your school offers them. I did cross-country in high school and made a few good friendships out of it. Now I know some people are not gifted athletically but that should not stop someone from trying to enjoy themselves. I usually finished close to last in cross-country but I enjoyed the friendships I made with people from my school as well as other schools. I am not sure if your religious but if you are, church is a good way to build some good friendships. I used to go to church and made a few decent friendships that way. School clubs are always a good bet if you do something you enjoy. For example, if you enjoy politics try out Student Government. The key is to do something you like because you will be with people who have the same interest as you do and that will help build friendships because you and the other people would have something in common. Now, making new friends as a senior is a little difficult because everyone is in their own cliques that late in their high school career. There is nothing wrong with having a lot of guy friends, most of mine in high school were females. Since you are a senior there is no reason to try and change who you are or your style. I would not recommend that ever. You need to be yourself! If you like hanging out with guys, keep at it. I am sure that during lunch there will be several options for you. Sit with the football players, or even sit with the loners in high school. It would brighten some of those kids days just to have someone take an interest in them. This is stupid but a big thing in school is popularity, and people will not associate with those kids because it makes them look bad. I had a few friends who were loners in high school and once you get to know them they can be really nice caring people. You say your not fake, so I take it popularity is not something you worry about which is great. All I can really say is that if you do not take it upon yourself to approach new people and talk to them or join clubs/sports then your chances of making new friends are nearly impossible. I wish you the best and I hope Janna can offer you more on this. Merry Christmas and thanks for emailing me.
-Kyle
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Published in: on December 25, 2009 at 10:30 pm  Leave a Comment  

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